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I am finally doing it.

I’m pulling back the wine-stained wearable blanket on the thing that has brought 21,000 glorious humans to my newsletter over the last 6 years.

It’s not a webinar… or freebie… or stupid-ass lead magnet.

It’s a mirror.

The cool kids call it a quiz, but I’m not cool. I’m the anti-cool kid with a stiff middle finger + a love of showing people their reflection.

I built it from my ooey-gooey soul… my oddly misfit-shaped brain… and my deep, unexplainable anti-guru desire to help my kindreds actually understand themselves and not just get a homework assignment in exchange for their email address.

(Also? It sells for me. With mostly vibes.)

So I’m gonna reverse-engineer the whole damn thing for you.

Not like “download this template” or “follow this 3-step blueprint.”

Fuck that unhelpful nonsense!

I’m going into the story of it. The guts. The rally cry. The artistic expression.

We’ll cover…

The idea. The name. The questions. The answers. The logic. The psychology. The sales.

The why behind every part.

All of it.

I’m gonna teach you how I made it. And how YOU can make your own.

But more than that, I’m gonna show you how to build an experience.

Something your kindreds walk away from going: “Damn. I feel seen!”

Because the last thing you need is another throwaway freebie that collects dust in the download's folder of people who regret giving you their email address.

Fuck that performative productivity.

We’re building something that sits in their bones.

That tells them who they are.

That shows them who you are.

That makes inviting them to grab your products + services feel like an organic act of kindness instead of a webinar pitch deck.

Because that’s the kind of “work” that actually works for those of us on this human hill.

The kind that honors YOUR kindreds, YOUR mission, YOUR flavor.

The kind that lets you build your own fun, feel-good success instead of duct-taping someone else’s empire onto your dying soul.

You don’t need a cheat sheet, a workbook, or a PDF checklist.

You need a mirror that reflects back something real.

So yeah.

I’m not calling it a fucking quiz. 🤢

I’m calling it a mirror… because that’s what it is when you do it the way I’m going to teach you.

We’re making that.

You want in?

This freebie-retiring, feel-good marketing playlist will land in Brandishing YOU on April 28th.

If you’re not a barfly already, consider this a loving elbow to the ribs to consider the idea.

It’s not even about the playlists I share.

It's about having a safe place where you don’t have to explain yourself, justify your wild ideas, or apologize for wanting something beyond the crusty old business playbook that hasn’t made sense in decades.

Because we’re not here to build a business that drains us, chains us, or turns us into burnt-out capitalism chew toys. We are here to build fun, feel-good businesses that support fun, feel-good lives.

We don’t have to fight for attention in a sea of content we don’t even want to create.

We don’t have to play the engagement game, chase trends, or shout into the void hoping someone hears us.

Our kindreds DON’T buy because of that BS; they buy because of the connection they feel with us.

The most connective marketing is creating something that makes your kindreds feel something worth talking about—themselves.

That’s the anti-content "game" we’re playing.

One that doesn’t drain you, but actually feeds your soul.

If you’re looking for a business-minded place where health + happiness are prioritized the same as growth + income… there’s a warm barstool + bunch of weirdos waiting for YOU.

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To feel-good moves, weird humans, and wearable blankets,
Dre ‘The Stiff Middle Finger of Marketing’ Beltrami